Marketing Report: A Message to our Shareholders




Above: mouse rocks Tekken, loves Cooling Pie Records' new comp, Crust Never Sleeps, Vol. 1

What it is piesans? As you all know by now, here at CPR we run with the mills.

In fact, I just dropped half a stack on a pair of Adidas not two and a half minutes ago.

Still, even though we're swimming in it (the mills, that is), we thought we'd let you all in on the way we survey our target market.

This morning I was videoconferencing with our PR boys out in Z├╝rich, and I had them fax me over some data on the response we've been getting to our first compilation album, Crust Never Sleeps (which you can rock right here).

Figure 1:

In one survey, respondents were asked to choose one of five different "buzz" words to describe the overall sound of Crust Never Sleeps. The buzz words were "Delicious," "Awesome," "Sexual," "Cryptosexual," and "Gastrosexual."



You see, here at CPR we like to keep it real. We're forthright about our goings-on. Our processes. Let's have a look at another graph.



In this survey, an enormous pod of sperm whales was asked to choose between five different "buzz" words. As you can see, the real-ness trend only continues. Indeed, we are the shit.

All in all, I hope you enjoyed this inside look at our intricate and well-oiled promotional juggernaut.

Lotsa love,

ST




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